Since Events Week is upon us, we decided to check in with Anthony Pratt to see how his off-season training is going. Only to find that where we expected to see our belowed LB there was nothing but a giant mountain of Protein Powder bags labeled "Clue Glue™: Ulta Gainz Edition". And when I say mountain, I mean the foyer of Clue manor was packed to the ceiling. If I had to estimate I'd say it was something like $5 million worth of protein powder, that's insane!
After we made our way through the maze of paths that had been carved into the mountain of gainz, we made our way into the library where we sat down to interview Mr.Pratt, who was busy running on his treadmill at max speed. It kind of reminded me of those Ottawa Senators post game interviews where they were on their training bikes cycling while doing the interview, anyways i regress. So we went in there with a plan for this interview, but that was all out the window now as we just had to ask
"Mr. Pratt, what is with the literal mountain of Clue Glue™: Ultra Gainz Edition in the foyer?"
To which his answer was simply "Well, coach *pant* said to spend my salary on equipment that *grunt* helps my Strength. So I *pant* figured spending $5 million on THE *grunt* BEST *grunt* PROTEIN *grunt* POWDER *grunt* MONEY *grunt* CAN *grunt* BUY (actually it's only Tier 1, but whatever) was the most *pant* logical *wheeze* solution."
After that I'm sad to admit our team was in too much disbelief to continue the interview and decided to simply excuse ourselves to protect what little is left of our sanity.